Hardest Year of my life.

Discussion in 'Chit-Chat' started by April Nicole, Sep 19, 2019.

  1. April Nicole

    April Nicole Well-Known Member

    So 2019 has to be hands down the hardest and also most joyful year of my life. To start off at the end of last year I finally decided to leave my controlling abusive husband. It was crazy. The kids and I bounced around for a while. Then we finally got our own place. Then I met the most wondeful man. Jason has been such a blessing to me and my kids. We all fell in love with him. My divorce went through and all seemed to be progressing well. We moved into a 6 bedroom 3 bath home. But then tragedy struck last month. I lost my only son. He was messing with a gun and it went off. I had just left. He showed me the gun and it appeared to be unloaded. It happened in front of 10 of his friends. Jason and I rushed back. They wouldn't let me in, but Jason ran to him. It was devastating. Jeatin was on life support for 3 days. There was no brain function. He was an organ donor and saved 6 lives. I fell apart completely. Jason arranged everything and by the grace of God we pulled off a beautiful funeral. There were so many people there the building was beyond capacity. My son was so loved !!! And through his death several young people got saved. We sold all that we had to give him a proper burial and are now struggling. But its ok. Cause I get to see God move and use my son's life to save many. The greif is hard. Unbearable at times. I'm asking for prayer. I need all that I can get. Snapchat-2034550459.jpg FB_IMG_1566219759360.jpg Snapchat-2139572374.jpg FB_IMG_1566054778943.jpg
     
  2. April Nicole

    April Nicole Well-Known Member

    Jestin. My only son. I have 5 daughters. FB_IMG_1566044137612.jpg
     
  3. Michele

    Michele Super Moderator Staff Member

    I'm so sorry for your loss.
     
    April Nicole likes this.
  4. Boxergirl

    Boxergirl Well-Known Member

    April, I have no words. I'm sorry isn't enough. Being a mother has been the greatest experience of my life and I can only imagine the grief you feel. I'm so glad that so much of Jestin will live on in those who received donations. My thoughts will remain with you and your family.

    I also want to tell you how very proud I am of you for removing yourself from your previous situation. I'm very glad you have a supportive partner to walk beside you and give support when you need it most.
     
    April Nicole likes this.
  5. April Nicole

    April Nicole Well-Known Member

    Thank you so much. I am devastated, but trying to be here for my other children. My mornings are hard. I am so thankful for Jason. He has stuck with me and loves me and the kids more than life. This is a picture of him and I at Jestins grave FB_IMG_1568905292916.jpg
     
  6. April Nicole

    April Nicole Well-Known Member

    Thank you
     
  7. Bailey's Mom

    Bailey's Mom Super Moderator Staff Member

    I don't know where to start, but first and foremost, I am deeply saddened by this news. I have a relative who has only one son and many daughters, losing any one of them would have been devastating, but the only boy...the one that they waited so long to have would have tested their faith to the breaking point.

    Our children are our immortality...our forever. I only have one child...by choice...largely, but if I lost her I would curl up and die. I almost did lose her and, as a result, I will never have grandchildren, though, thankfully, I will have grand-puppies to love me into old age.

    Your future landscape may change many times...it is bound to, but we love through it...we have to for our children...to remember the children we've lost, and to love our children who are left behind to grieve with us. Somehow in all that we do as Moms, we must find a way of being where threats like guns (loaded or unloaded) are not in our homes unsupervised. Unsupervised, guns steal our lives...our children's lives...our futures from us. My wish for all of us mothers is that we help our families lose our fascination with firearms.

    I hope your heart heals, and I hope that your family can grow together through this horror, and I hope that the peace that passes understanding will be yours and your family's.
     
    April Nicole likes this.
  8. DennasMom

    DennasMom Well-Known Member

    So sorry for your loss. I have no words. :(
    Prayers filled with love and gratitude for the time you had together, and all the lives your son helped save, are headed your way.
     
    April Nicole likes this.
  9. BlackShadowCaneCorso

    BlackShadowCaneCorso Super Moderator Staff Member

    I am so sorry for your loss and the trials your family has faced. I hope that times turn around for you and that you can find some peace and you and your family can heal.
     
    April Nicole likes this.
  10. Sheila Braund

    Sheila Braund Well-Known Member

    Oh my goodness April! I can’t even begin to imagine what you going threw. My greatest joy in life is my children and grandchildren.
    I can send you love and prayers. ((((Hugs)))
     
    April Nicole likes this.
  11. Jakesmum

    Jakesmum Well-Known Member

    I am so sorry for your loss. I can't even begin to imagine what you must be going through! I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers!
     
    April Nicole likes this.
  12. glen

    glen Super Moderator Staff Member

    I'm so so sorry for your loss, I wish there was more we could all do to ease your pain and sorrow,
     
    April Nicole likes this.
  13. Boxergirl

    Boxergirl Well-Known Member

    Just letting you know I'm thinking of you and the family, April.
     
    April Nicole likes this.
  14. April Nicole

    April Nicole Well-Known Member

    Thanks to everyone. I appreciate the thoughts and prayers so much.
     
    Sheila Braund likes this.

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