Getting a BM: male vs female conundrum...

[Joao M]

Hi

Since this is my 1st post, a brief introduction: João, 46 y.o., father of 3 teenagers, divorced, born and currently living in Lisbon, Portugal. All my life had animals living with me (dogs, fish, reptiles, birds...). A pet-person, obviously

After mourning a female boxer that was my companion for the part 10 years I am getting a BM in the nexts few of months.

I already selected the kennel and have been chatting with the breeder. I have also been spending time with the 3 BM ( 1M;2 F) of a good friend of mine. Walking and feeding them, etc.

So, the male vs female debate...

The size diff is obvious and would favour the decision on getting a male, but the temperament will dictate my choice.

I haven´t found much to read on the diff of temperament, but what I found could be summarize as follows:
- males: more stubborn, more "goofy", much more dominant and same gender agressive;
- females: more independent (perhaps less eager to please), moody.

My living conditions: good sized apartment close to parks; will be alone part of the day (mornings or afternoons).
If I choose a female she wil be spayed (probably between 1st and 2nd cycles).

My friend recommends female. What are you thoughts?

Thanks in advance
Joao

 

[dpenning]

Welcome to the forum. I'm sure folks with more experience will chime in. I never thought about the difference in temperament between male and female but I have a female and she IS very independent. Good luck with your choice and post pics when you get your new pup!

 

[joee5]

Welcome and good luck with your future pick. I prefer a female, and with the exception of 1 dog that was a male, because they seem to bond better with my wife and 2 daughters. I'm outnumbered anyway so why not.

 

[karennj]

I have heard that females are more independent but honestly the females I have known have acted no differently than the males in regards to being close to their owner. I think just like people they all have their own personality and traits. In regards to same sex aggression I have found the females are usually more of a problem. They seem to fight more with other females. If you plan to get a female and then add a second dog at some time I would choose a male just for the best possible outcome. If your not sure on male or female then I would suggest telling the breeder the type or personality you are looking for and let them choose the best dog for you out of the entire litter. Good breeders assign pups to people based on it being a good match not based on who came first. The breeders know the pups better than anyone.

 

[Joao M]

Thanks for the warm welcome and your input.

Any others want to chime in?

 

[DDSK]

I have two female dogs now, the 1st females I have ever had in a long line of dogs.
I think I prefer females.

 

[Rugers-Kris]

I just wanted to welcome you to the forum. I always get boys so I really can't tell you the difference in the sexes.

 

[AKBull]

My previous BM was a female. She was fairly clingy to the family and very, very sweet. The only thing she wasn't sweet with was other dogs. If you were anything other than her EM brother she grew up with, you were on the menu.

My current male BM is more independent, goofy, WAY more stubborn and loves most other dogs. Unless they are large males, then the gloves are off.

I couldn't say which I prefer more (I love/loved them both).

 

[Joao M]

Thank you for the replies

I had a long chat with the breeder yesterday and he told me what was his experience with the breed (although it is different to have the dogs in a kennel or at home):

1. Indepence: Males more independent (contrary to what I wrote in the previous post); females more attached to the owner (but not the point of suffering from anxiety);


2. Mood: Females (much) more moody; Males more stubborn but easier to turn around (usually "that look" or a treat is enough) - a lot like my teenager kids....

3. Same gender agressiveness: Females easier to trigger (more intolerant towards other females) but usually the quarrel is brief and easy to stop; Males don´t star a battle because of a "wrong look" but when they start.... is serious stuff. Very dificult to break

So, based on this I think I will wait for the litter and see what are the recommendations of the breeder ( M and F) and then choose the one the "catches me" the most.

Preferably a male brindle, but with a totally opened agenda

Now, the waiting game begins...

 

[austex24]

Sorry to hear about your loss, but you could not have picked a better breed for your next pup!

I bred Boxers for years and swore I would never own any other breed. When my last boxer passed away, we rescued a 1 year old BM male.

That was eight years ago, and we just added another BM pup to our pack who is now 16 weeks old.

Having bred Boxers and now own two BM's, I can not imagine owning any other type of dog including Boxers.

I can't tell you what gender would be better because both of our's are males. Our nine year old has cancer and will not be with us long enough to run into problems with owning two males as the pup is only 4 months now and breeder said we should not have Male on Male aggression problems until he reaches maturity, so our next will definitely be a girl.

I can tell you that we purposely added another boy because we loved our male so much. He's extremely protective of my wife and kids, but not me at all. Extremely loving, loyal, well behaved and just a joy to be around.

Good luck and keep us updated when you add your BM to your family!

 

[Joao M]

Tks Austex! I will keep you all posted but not likely to have news before Christmas.

Sorry to hear about your older male BM. I lost my boxer to cancer (amongst other problems) as well and its not easy.

 

[AR-HICK]

Brindle Male, nice choice and I hope that works out. To be honest I don't think it matters much on the color or sex you will love either one.
My sister has a 50 pound lab mix female that bosses my 115 male BM around.
It is really funny a male doesn't stand a chance in the dog world either, us males getting bossed everywhere we go:razzberry:

 

[Joao M]

It is really funny a male doesn't stand a chance in the dog world either, us males getting bossed everywhere we go:razzberry:

That is a universal truth...

 

[Joao M]

Last week the parents of my future BM had it going and now we are just waiting for confirmation that they did the job properly (we´ll find out in 10 days +/-)

Father "Paco" is brindle with a masking gene and mother "Kika" is red, so each puppy has 50% chances of being brindle, 25% red and 25% fawn.

Let´s hope the odds favour me !

 

[EverythingEnglishMastiff]

Personally I've always prefered female dogs. I feel they are more "attached". When we went to go get our first mastiff I chose the breeder, and more importantly the parents and I had it in my head I wanted a brindle female. The first time I went to go see the puppies I took my 6yo little sister along with me. She picked out a fawn male. The next time I went back Hank was 6 weeks old. I had my 14yo step-daughter with me and wouldn't you know, she picked the same dog out of the litter. So we got a Hank baby. He will be 3 in Jan.

Roxy is my female. She'll be 1 in Jan. My wife picked the breeder and the puppy with the help of our neighbor and surprised me with a beautiful brindle. They did a damn fine job. I love my lil "Foxy" Roxy.

I've only had Hank get into a fight 1 time and it was about a month ago. It was with his nearing maturity son. It wasn't so serious that anyone was injured. Scared the hell out of everyone though. I honestly believe it was my fault. Jack is a love bug and a heavy leaner during pets. I lean right back but I also like to hug them around the torso. My thinking is Hank was jealous or he thought he was protecting me. Haven't had another issue since but I don't go hanging all over Jack anymore either. Hank is a goofy shit. He's all about food. Crappy, good, or w/e its FOOD lol. He can also be a little stubborn. He has his day planned out I think sometimes and some days he's pickier about sticking to that schedule lol. You can see him thinking it out sometimes. Overall he's a good boy. Until there are bitches in heat across the street. Then he turns into a whining baby bound and determined to get over there no matter what and pass his seed. We're working on it lol... He's a dream with kids, but a lil over excited when he was young.

Roxy is more independant. When Hank and I are inside if it's nice out she's in the shade on guard. If there's movement outside, she lets me know. Hank never even barked until he was almost 2 years old. Even still he only barks at Humans. Which is fine cause that's pretty much all I really want them to bark at anyways, strangers. For Hank I think it was more learned. He would run out with the pack across the street when they would bark. Eventually he got it. With Roxy it was more instinctual. She started off barking at everything. We've toned that down a bit and now the "extra" barking is mostly at night when other dogs bark, her initial reaction is to bark and inspect. We've even been working on that and it's down to a minimum. But, if she isn't outside on guard, she's right there with me and that's where Hank is always at.It's almost like Hank is guarding my person, and Roxy is guarding her territory. Same with Jack and Martha. Jack is all about his people and Martha is all about her yard. Jill is a shy, sweet little girl. Theodore, he's just a grumpy ol' man that thinks he's still top dog. It's quite cute the group dynamic.

I believe Roxy is maturing mentally faster than Hank did. Go figure... She is as sharp as a tack and learns new things very quickly. Seems to be a little more focused than Hank was at the same age. She not as food grubby either. Hank will try and get your attention, then try and coax you into the kitchen lol. Which is pretty smart, to be manipulative, that's a complex thought.

Well, that's been my experience with some of the differances. Hope my rambling helped lol.

 

[BigMevy]

I have a brindle BM, he's a little over 2 years now. In regards to temperament I really do think a lot of it is just in the breeding, if you have parents with a good demeanor more than likely you're pup will be fine regardless of sex. That said, I do think males tend to be more protective and aggressive in general, but again it just depends.

All I can tell you is my guy is great. He's not aggressive at all, the only time he alerted on anyone was just some random guy in the street he must have gotten a bad vibe from. Couldn't really tell you why. Other than that he's always been a social butterfly and loves going up and getting petted/scratched by anyone willing. He's never shown any aggression towards other dogs either, he's pretty submissive really and has never even stood up for himself yet. He is fairly independent, though he is attached to me. He doesn't run and greet me at the door and doesn't get all worked up when I've been away for a few days. He's just glad to see me.

I did get him neutered pretty early according to most folks on this forum, I did it at 6 months as recommended by the vet. He never had any issues from it, and I think it was a good decision.

Bottom line, get whichever you want.

 

[EverythingEnglishMastiff]

Oh this a video of My dog Hank, the fawn on his back. Playing with littermates as a puppy. This is 6-8 weeks after having lived with us? We went back to just see how everyone was doing and to play with littermates. The big boy whooping up on Hank is named Tank. The adult Mastiff in the video is Hanks daddy.

[video=youtube;rohXXo3q2DY]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rohXXo3q2DY[/video]

 

[Joao M]

Thank you verty much for taking the time to write such extensive replies detailing your personal experiences.
It is really helpfull
João