Sometimes you have to do what you need to do to be able to do what you should do. And when it feels like everything has been taken away from you, something comes along to make you want to keep on doing what you CAN do.
My family raised Irish Wolfhounds and German Sheps. I cannot remember a a time when there wasn't a litter of something wandering around. I grew up, moved away from home, started a life I could be proud of, raised my son to be a fine young man and a stellar attorney, and did what all mothers do; set aside their own dreams to ensure their family is safe and secure. My son, now 30, (am I really that OLD?) encouraged me to follow my dream of also becoming an attorney. At 47 I entered law school, graduated, sat for the Bar exam only to find that I had a problem. Severe unrelenting headaches, shortness of breath, paralyzing weakness, an unrelenting need for sleep...yup, problem! I thought it was just the Bar exam, but it was something else entirely.
There are some things that are diagnosed by eliminating every other possiblilty, no matter how remote, before coming to a conclusion. One thing that is not in question are the lesions on my brain that have changed my life. The hole in my heart was repaired, and various extensive tests have been conducted. What has not happened however, is my life moving forward. Full stop. Walking to the mailbox was a frightening thing to do when you feel like you are going to pass out or worse. Spun my head completely. After much prayer and many doctors, I decided that I needed to do something for me. Enter Sophie!
I am aware that exercise is important for me, but it must be safe exercise. You won't do it if you don;t enjoy it. While recovering from the heart repair, I remembered all the time I spend with the big dogs of my youth and how much I enjoyed them and felt safe. I desperately needed to feel safe again! My 80 year old neighbor dragged me out of the house every day for a walk bless her heart. We talked about what would make me happy, and what would make me whole again in my heart and soul. Almost a year went by and we were still talking.
I have always had an amazing connection with animals of all kinds, more so than with people. The more I know of some people the more I appreciate my dog was not just a funny statement for me. I trained horses for over 30 years, fixing the ones other "trainers" had screwed up and bailed on, and learned to really despise people who claimed they knew what they were doing and really didn;t and the party that suffers is the animal. That requires patience, confidence, consistency, determination, creativity and the ability to think outside the box. I decided I needed a service dog. A BIG service dog! I researched many breeds but there was always something not quite right, then I found the Corso. Long story short (too late I know)...
I am not a person who sheds tears easily. When looking at pups, I thought I wanted a male. Until I saw Sophie. Her amber eyes (not appreciated in the show ring) melted my heart. Her persistent muzzle in my face made me realize that sometimes you just have to keep on doing what is good for YOU! She was good for me. She was so sweet she made me cry! My frequently absent husband voiced his concerns which went virtually unheard. She was my dog from that moment on, period. Yes, they can be a PITA, but they wouldn't bother if they didnt love you (and yes, I am referring to the DOG not husbands, though the same can be said of them as well!) They can be stubborn, demanding, freakishly cute, and at the same time, your best friend, your shoulder to cry on and your most dedicated advocate. My 80 year old neighbor and I walk together every day with Sophie who does me proud with her obedience and uncompromising determination. Aloof? You bet! But she loves me and doesn't care that I am not the lawyer I worked so hard to be and cannot be due to illness. She only cares that we are together and enjoy each other so completely. My neighbor loves her so much, she ordered an Oli collar for her so she will have lovely accessories when she grows up!
A poet once wrote that there are other ways to go through life besides being dragged, kicking and screaming. With all the things that have happened these last couple of years, it felt like I was being dragged!
But with Sophies help, I figured out the better way. Take a Cane Corso out for a walk and enjoy yourself! Only a corso would appreciate MY needs, and love me back in return!
